final thoughts

In a dreadfully slow manner the week has come to an end and I am returning to America tomorrow. I am having difficulty believing that 24 hours from now I will be flying 30000 feet above the ocean.

I spent the past week anticipating the next 24 hours and as such the hours have stagnantly trickle past. Nonetheless, I am very excited that my homecoming has finally arrived. I feel a bit like a convict that has spent the last several months in the same confined space..... My heart is yearning to experience the public sphere; restaurants, movies, and social gatherings. I am ready to express myself in complete sentences and fully comprehend signage. I cannot wait to hug my family and friends!

Although I eagerly anticipate American soil, there are several parts of Korea that I will miss. First and foremost I will miss my students. Interacting with my students I learned a lot about Korean culture and myself. I am still amazed with the significantly long amount time kids spend in school. Elementary school students stay out till 11 o'clock at night studying at private academies and many attend class Saturday or Sunday. Without my students I would have never understood Korean holidays like Chusok and many other intricacies of Korean life. Teaching classses also helped me formulate several conclusions about my own life. For instance, I now want to have my own children after closely observing the beauty of young minds. I am more committed to finding a long-term job geared towards the assistance of others.

Living in Korea has provided me with many insights into life. Many of my beliefs about humanity have been affirmed through anthropological observations. I plan to use these affirmations to direct my energies for the next several years. Now more than ever I understand and appreciate the love and support of my friends and family. I know that without these people my life is colorless and fragmentary. Furthermore, lacking the access to so many components of my former life leaves me that much more grateful and cognitive of my good-fortune. It is easy pass up experience when they are abundant and consequently encounter a limited subset of impressions. I feel more empowered to proactively pursue different situations and comprehend the unfamiliar phenomena.

My lasting impression of Korea will be a nation of truly kind and polite people. My everyday existence was exceptionally brightened by the essentially wordless communication that littered my time in Korea. Kindness from the bakery couple, who gave me gifts every other visit, or the smile of the convenience store owner are emblazoned in my memory. The basic respect that is incorporated into all basic gestures and phrases is truly admirable.

Besides Korean people, I am most grateful for my coworkers. I think I would have gone insane if it were not for the English conversation we shared in the teacher's room. I think the strangeness of our situation encouraged much more rapid friendships that would rarely occur in the states. I will miss them all.

I want to thank everyone at home for reading this blog, sending me emails, and listening to my complaints. Without my connections in California, I probably would have fallen into some deep depression. I love you all very dearly and cannot wait to see your faces!

Now before I attempt to sleep, which I doubt will be successful, I have one request........... Would you like to meet me for American or Mexican food in Los Angeles or Orange County?

Affectionately yours
-Holly-

no turkeys in korea

Dear readers.

Well unexpected news has provided the impetus for my early departure from Korea. As such I have one week left to spend in Cheongju.

Following the finalization of my flight early this week, time has slowed dramatically from mind-numbing roar of the last four months. I am so excited to be home! The anticipation is dually wonderful and terrible, and courses through me as I eagerly await the glorious MONDAY and count down the hours, minutes, and seconds remaining.
This Thursday was Thanksgiving, which I did not truly celebrate. I hung out in my apartment in the afternoon and worked during the evening. I cannot say I had a exceptionally good meal for lunch or dinner, however I did make some chocolate thumbprint cookies for my coworkers. Regardless of the lack of external celebration, I spent the day mindful of the wonderful people in my life. I really am quite lucky; I have wonderful parents that provide unconditional support and a beautiful sister/best friend that fills my life with love and joy. My extended family has maintained a constant affectionate presence throughout all of my endeavors, for which I am extremely grateful . In addition to a fantastic family, I feel so fortunate to possess a strong base of loving friends that shower my life with good cheer. Even though I sometimes fool myself to think otherwise, I now know that all of these people truly care for me. I hope my oftentimes hermetic behavior does not fool anyone, because the time shared with loved ones is a primary input for my well-being. I love you all so much.

Thinking about the people that care brings me to a related topic, the people that fail to show up. In my short 21 years of life, I have already encountered too many undependable capricious individuals. As I endow trust easily, on several occasions my heart has suffered beatings from these peoples careless actions. Although I try to embrace pain as unavoidable and necessary, there is no need to wastefully invest energy in a unilateral relationship. I believe that if a person genuinely desires your company they will take the time to call, write, or show up. I consider a failure to contact or appear as an indication of disinterest. Thus, I am going to renew my resolution and avoid pursuing unreciprocative individuals. If those people later realize their manifestation of apathy, I will not discriminate and grant an open-armed reception.

Well, one week left..... Check next Sunday for my final thoughts on Korea.

Sending all of my love,
-Holly-

smiles, gumdrops, and figments of our imaginations

Hello World!

I have arrived, I am very happy this week. My insides are singing with anticipation and life is looking positive.

Wednesday brought............. SNOW! I know super cool right? Yes, yes I am a Californian. My coworker, Lauren, and I were super childish staring and frolicking in the icy flakes. It was my second experience with falling snow, so I was quite fascinated. The negative component of the snowy weather is the freezing temperature. I have never felt so cold in all of my life. When I walk outside its like my bones ache with coldness. At this point I am wearing pants, boots, 2 sweaters, a coat, thick gloves, and a tightly wrapped scarf. Each time I see myself, my nose is Rudolph-red and my lips are a lovely shade of purple. In response to the harsh elements, coffee-drinking has developed into a means of warming my body. I am still weirded out by my consumption of coffee..........

The generosity of Korean store-owners provides me with some emotional warmth to combat the bleak weather. As I have mentioned in previous posts Korean store-owners frequently give me little gifts. This week, when I came in for my tri-weekly visit, the bakery owner gave me these heart-shaped pocket warmers upon seeing my sniffling and shivering state. Yesterday, the convenience store man gave a humongous apple with my water. I was very touched by their benevolence. i think their tokens are in appreciation of my regular business. I like the personal aspect to their businesses and feel more inclined to make purchases. They have perhaps unknowingly mastered the principles of good business.

I have been contemplating the degree to which our lives are truly selfish. My perspectives has always rested on the idea that since life is carried out in one's own body, we tend to act in self-centered ways. However even seemingly egotistical motives typically include accommodation for any nearby humanity. For instance if someone is committing a selfish act, they will modify or frame their actions such that other people will still regard them positively. Additionally in many ways an individual's happiness oftentimes rests completely on the interactions and affection gained from others. Complicatedly enough, although humans fundamentally strive to promote self-interest, we are constantly adapting and conforming to the needs and desires of those intersecting our habitats. Perhaps this ever-present accommodation makes the world a functional place, where people pursue their own well-being yet reframe from infringing upon the livelihood of others.

I hope everyone enjoys their turkey and family gatherings this week. Holidays can become stale and redundant when we forget their true meanings and regard them as an obligation to our social intersections. Rather than performing your part in an elaborate meaningless charade, try acting upon your unfeigned needs for love and companionship. Perhaps you will find Thanksgiving and Christmas obligations less tedious and embrace the conviviality intended for these days:)

All of my love,
-Holly-

Rosy Disenchantment

Hola Hola! Well my lovely people, the week flew by and it is Sunday yet again. The week was both tiresome and uplifting............

With classes back in full swing my days seem much more full and worthwhile. It is so encouraging when my students enjoy class and express and genuine interest in learning. Since I love education so much I try to convey to them the beauty of learning. I truly believe there are few things more glorious than knowledge. I frequently notice that the students are not motivated by learning, but by receiving a above-average grade. While I see some value in earning good grades, it is sad that young folks lose their curiosity and fervor in the education system.

At the end of the week, I received a great complement from a student, that is one of the sweetest things anyone has said to me; One of our conversation topics in class was if you were a food, what food would you be? After all the students had spoke I had them think of what food I would be. One student said " You would be sauce." A little confused I asked him " How am I like sauce?" and he replied " Sauce makes everything delicious like your kindness makes everyone happy." I thought that was a) incredibly poetic b) absolutely adorable!

Outside of class, as usual, my time was quite insipid and colorless. I did realize that Thanksgiving may be worse than I had foreseen... As Koreans obviously do not celebrate Thanksgiving and it is a Thursday holiday, I will be working Thanksgiving. I am reasonably upset about my realization, but hoping that work will distract and not depress me. In other news I am spending some time researching graduate programs and planning for the near future. I plan to begin studying and take the GRE soon, in addition to submit applications to several masters degree programs. With any luck these efforts will distract me for several weeks.

Recent events have reawakened dreams that I thought were lost, and these possibilities have left me daydreaming and envisioning future prospects. Sometimes I have a hard time separating dream from reality and I hope that my musings will lack any negative effects. Like many times in the past I ache to jump in the water, but remain standing at the shore looking absentmindedly at the sky. Maybe one day somebody will push me in.........

To conclude this posting: I think my experience in Korea is ultimately positive, because if nothing else, I am mentally navigating toward the narrowing trajectory of my future.

Je ne sais pas

Hola mis amigos!

Como estas? I am decent enough, thanks for asking:) Here in Cheongju the new semester has started and I continue to freeze my buns off.......

After my week-long vacation, I was ready to kick off the new semester. I am really pleased with my classes; all of the kids seem well-behaved and at least partially interested in learning English. As each class was spent introducing materials and ourselves, the week was quite low stress. I am pretty excited to try some new lessons out and hopefully inspire some learning. As I have mentioned before, Korean kids are so overwhelmed with endless hours of school that they are oftentimes disillusioned with education. It saddens me that young kids could already dislike their education, so I do my best to create an interactive classroom and encourage participation.

On a side note I wanted to say I am extremely grateful for Dunkin Donuts. Without Dunkin Donuts my life would be significantly less pleasant. Besides my morning bagel, they fuel my new coffee interest and supply a convenient location for my Korean-culture investigations. So thank goodness for Dunkin Donuts! (and no I was not payed for advertisement)

Besides work, I have been focusing on Thanksgiving preparations. As I am in Korea, procuring the necessary Thanksgiving items, is a slight challenge. I think that in many ways being removed from your country makes national holidays more salient. It seems like less of a commercial event and much more an important tradition. So, I really want to create a true Thanksgiving for my coworkers. I think that being away from our loved ones, all of us are going to be sad, and thus having something similar to home will be quite crucial.

This weekend, reading at Dunkin Donuts and observing several Korean couples, I noticed that Korean women seem to transcend the men. Most of them are so perfectly dressed and stunningly beautiful, that their wiry sweethearts seem inferior. Yet, I find their interactions adorable! The younger men, maybe realizing their girlfriends stature, are constantly tending to the women's needs and desires. However, the older men appear indifferent or dispassionate towards their wives. I wonder what encourages this dwindling interest that the men demonstrate. I guess I must continue to observe and make guesses...................

Well the new week has begun and school is going to return to full-speed. I will be thinking of everyone at home as I grade papers and teach English conversation:)

All of my Love,
-Holly-

Eggs Sunny Side Up

Hello All!

First of all, Thank you for the posts last week! It is helpful to know someone is listening and cares. After reading them, I decided I needed to concentrate less on the negative and focus on the attainable and present.
With positive-proton thoughts in mind I decided to travel to Busan during my vacation week. It was a refreshing trip and I am glad that I ventured out of Cheongju. Busan is the second largest Korean city, so it is very metropolitan. I used the trip as an opportunity to indulge in some Western food and plenty of people-watching. Things I observed: A million cute-Korean couples like the others that seem to spill out of the streets. There is a curious waffle and ice-cream trend that appears exclusive to Busan. Busan also offers these ultra-ornate italian restaurants, which teem with the previously mentioned couples. In other news: I am now a coffee drinker.... During the trip it seemed appropriate to have cup of coffee, which I discovered to be quite delectable. Following that first cup, several more followed, and have added fuel to my caffeine addiction.
The remainder of my vacation-week was spent relaxing in Cheongju. I did go to the bar for a Halloween party, which was thrown primarily for the small foreigner population residing in Cheongju. I was stoked to dance to the bad garage rock music and interact with other humans. The evening was enjoyable, but ended poorly due to some sleazy middle-age man's inappropriate behavior.
I am happy to report that meal preparation remains as a primary source of entertainment. My abilities and culinary adventures are broadening and have culminated to this evening's Thyme-roasted Duck breast with vanilla red wine sauce accompanied by roasted sweet potato and poached pear (Thank goodness for comfort-packages and online shopping). I am very impressed with myself:) Finding recipes and cooking is comfortably reminiscent of home and provides me with a creative outlet. I hope my Grandma Bingham would be proud.
In closing here is a list of things I like about Korea:
1) The yellow, red, and brown leaves that litter the streets and I kick as I am walking
2) Little kids playing outside at night without supervision, because safety is not an issue
3) Teaching my classes
4) Genuinely friendly sales clerks
5) self-sufficiency

Sending all my love,
-Holly-

one strange clock

Hello all. This week I feel more emo-kid than usual. Throughout the week I have repeatedly been overcome with the desire to walk in the wind and run in the rain. Usually these types of cravings reflect my inner-turmoil.

At school it was finals week, so I found my classes more relaxed. As the kids tested, I essentially read for an hour. I am feeling increasingly more confident teaching. In fact work is my favorite part of Korea. In addition to taking a central role in the learning process, which I so dearly love, I am assured 6 hours of other humanity and source for conversation. So despite the lack of a strong infrastructure or leadership, I enjoy teaching.

The cycles across time are most intriguing ; some people move and others leave. Both physically and emotionally our fellow humans, like ourselves, are in constant flux. There are no guarantees that people will stay. So living life we must constantly readjust our cognitive structures to account for the constant fluctuation of people. One thing that is true in all cases is one can never calculate all the possible variations life throws us. At the moment I doing my best to cope with these undulations and find myself holding onto those that have fallen away. I wonder if the cycle will complete and I will find myself in their company again. Or perhaps those individuals are permanently relocated, lost in another orbit somewhere in this immense world.

I have ceased keeping track of my time in Korea because it is daunting to think about the time ahead of me. I miss having my family and friends nearby. I have grown weary of my isolated life. I have grown weary of myself and my thoughts. I wish someone was here to give me hugs whenever I wanted one. I wish I was more flexible and that I could just assimilate here. In reality I make the choice, so it is my own inexorable nature that prevents me from being comfortable. Yet realizing this I cannot will myself. I do not know what needs to change. Should I will myself to change my expectations? No, I already have done so. Or maybe change my routines? Well, I have certainly modified my routines since moving. Then what is it I cannot accept? Maybe that one can live without affectionate interactions..... I refuse to abondon this hope, because it drives me forward.

Affectionately yours,
-Holly-

What week is it?

My apologies readers I failed to post last week. Although it is largely an excuse, I just didn't have the energy to write.

It is getting cold in Cheongju. For those of you that know me well, I oftentimes feel cold regardless of warm weather. In reflection of my cold-temperature intolerance, living in Korea is an odd decision. As I decided, I knew it was a strange choice-- but I concluded that abandoning my comfort zone was desirable. I only hope that while I am mingling outside of familiar areas my physical health does not suffer.......... My plan for the winter is to buy a massive winter coat and run to my various destinations, which will also help maintain my VO2 max :)

The last week I felt rather fatigued. Perhaps this weariness can be correlated to the cold weather? I am not positive on their source, but my low energy levels influenced a very inactive week. Besides my grocery store expeditions and nightly work, I dawdled about my apartment accomplishing absolutely nothing. I irritate myself with my aptitude for wasting time. I could complete countless books or learn more Korean, yet I fritter away hour after hour.........

On another note, this weekend I was pondering the human need for control. Given uncertain or ambiguous situations, most people feel threatened and immediately act to manipulate their surroundings. Why is it that we struggle with the obscure and indeterminate? In reality everything in the future is contingent upon an infinite number of variables. Yet, we frequently fool ourselves thinking that future events are governable-- somehow submissive to our desires. Perhaps it is an emotional survival strategy; pretend to command the environment rather than recognizing that life's events result from the interaction of boundless contingencies. I wonder which strategy is more beneficial: constantly struggling with the environment or accepting uncertainty while remaining aware of danger. Hmmm a worthy question for contemplation.......

With that my lovely readers I am off to freeze my buns off!

Life

Hello All,

This week I am not really sure what to write about.

My work week was basically unremarkable; The kids have midterms, so many of my classes cancelled. Although cancelled class resulted in free evenings, I would have preferred the dinero in my pocket. I have yet to make a cash store, and with bills to pay, my affairs are a bit tight. Nonetheless I spent several enjoyable evenings at Dunkin Donuts reading. I am hoping that I will have more hours this week and I can work towards earning a small nest egg.

Half way through the week I ventured over to the local gym. I was to secure dance studio usage with persuasive body language. Despite my sore body I am excited about this development. For me dancing is a cleansing ritual; an event where all of my energies can transform, flow, explode, or release. This week I undoubtedly needed to confront some difficult emotions.

This Friday I experienced my first Korean bowling alley. The bowlers were primarily young couples that came equipped with their own bags, balls, and nifty gloves. They were all quite serious. I managed to have fun despite my poor bowling skills and haggard state.

I continue to ponder questions of identity and future. I suppose for a 21 year old woman these questions are quite expected, yet living in Korea forces me to immediately confront them. Within the past week, the question of disconnected actions vs. exhibitions of identity were of particular salience. To what degree is an individual's actions an exhibition of their character or merely a product of situation. I tempted to say that actions can be completely separate from an individual's personality makeup, but it seems that actions are a function of both character and situational pressures. I believe actions result from a complicated algorithm of pressures, which influence a person to choose their particular action. Thus, situation and identity are equally important inputs. This means that any impressive magnitude of situational pressure cannot overpower a person's psychological foundation. Therefore, deplorable actions can never be completely separated from one's true capacities. We must own our actions because ultimately they are a product of our own beings.

It is curious to contemplate the composition of one's true being. What composes an identity? If the only way to measure an identity is overt actions, and these actions result partly from external influences...... It is mind-boggling to attempt and reverse-calculate identity from behavior and limitless external inputs. Another thought; Whatever identity is, can it be quantified as good or bad? If so, what is the rubric of measurement?

There is a good possibility that these answers are indeterminable and that I waste time with my inquiries. Yet, I will continue my efforts as I wonder the streets of Cheongju................

self-awareness

Hello All,

Another week has passed here in Cheongju. Within that time I have thwarted an alien takeover, broke up a major crime-syndicate, and reached the peak of Korea's largest summit.
Hmm perhaps the last sentence was an exaggeration. Here is the real story............

Now that I am teaching full-time the time passes much quicker than before. Perhaps my distorted perception of time is a reflection of the content of my daily activities. which have undergone a remarkable transformation following my relocation to Korea:
School starts at 4 pm, but we arrive early to prepare for the students. Prior to school, my day is rather unremarkable. After waking up I toast a bagel in a skillet pan(yes, yes it is possible). While eating breakfast, I typically perform online research on whatever oddity has captured my interest. Then I walk down to the market to pick up some fresh produce and enjoy the usual stares of the resident employees. Following the store, I go for a run and lift some 250 pounders( you know the usual). By the time I shower and have lunch I begin work. Then BAM work is over at 10:30ish and I am ready for bed. So I have related this delightful narrative to illustrate the odd life I am experiencing; a simple stream of unalloyed perceptions and experiences.

As a result of my current lifestyle, I am learning to more thoroughly enjoy the small pleasures of life. Lunch is typically the highlight of my day; I have perfected a delectable balsamic chicken bell pepper skillet and a superb ranch-cajun chicken salad. the local Dunkin Donuts has morphed into my reading spot. My daily market-trip is banal, but nonetheless enjoyable.

My walks and time spent at Dunkin Donuts are a gateway for deep thought and observations of the many that lives that bubble past and fall behind. Now more than any other time in my life I am an observer. I watch the gossiping middle-aged women, endless supply of laughing schoolchildren, the soju-greased men, and stooped ajummas. My observations have reinforced many of beliefs about people and culture. Some facets of culture are important parts of daily life and deeply connected to particular thoughts and actions. Despite some superficial differences, all people seem to share most of the same basic motivations. My observations leave me more passionately against racism and ethnocentrism. If people are essentially the same, it is illogical and cruel to judge another individual as inferior because of their fashion-sense and culinary practices. Yet, who said humans were always logical and kind?

The constant sightings of happy groups leave me pensive and hungry for close contact. Although a lot of my time in California is spent alone, with family and nearby loved ones, I rarely disliked the solitude. I still usually enjoy my solitude, however I frequently wish I had someone to share it with.

After another week I am more confident with my Korean existence and hopeful for the upcoming weeks , but still unsatisfied with my cheeseless pizza...........

Acceptance

Well my small readership,

Another week has passed in Cheongju and I remain alive. This is positive news, although expected, it is still positive.........

This week my transition into independent-teaching is the biggest news. As Tedd unfortunately left this week( I am still crying inside), I am now the teacher of 11 classes. I feel that being a teacher is a large responsibility-- teachers are a significant source of student motivation. The composition of a lesson plans oftentimes determines the degree of a kid's attention-level. Ultimately a student decides their path through their education, but the individuals they meet along way are noteworthy influences. So taking over this week was slightly stressful because I really want to do a good job. When the classes are large, I feel that I have not delivered what the students deserve. I hope that I will learn methods of ensuring good instruction despite large class-size.

It is strange how quickly the time passes.......
I feel like a few hours after I wake up it is time for work and then bam! time for sleep. The way that time flows causes me to feel unproductive. I should intensify my efforts in learning korean(which are currently quite insubstantial). Learning Korean would greatly facilitate the fluidity of my my maneuvering. With such limited means of expression, I feel rather silly getting in cabs and going to the store.

As I stayed in Cheongju this weekend, I lack any exciting adventures to report. I did have a lot of time to reflect on existence.......

Life is full of intricate webs of human connection. We are driven to make contact with others, to share a piece of our lives. I think this drive comes from a subconscious motivation to make our personal existence real. For an individual to leave a record on this earth, another individual must witness a piece of their existence and take possession of that fragment. If we lived our lives without contacting other people, there would be no proof of one's reality. Thus, a large component of any individual's life is spent making these interpersonal connections.
I would explain the general human desire to love and be loved results from the drive to leave a piece of ourselves in this world. Although subconsciously this drive is selfish, it does not take away from the beauty of caring for other people. In my experience there is no greater feeling than embracing loved ones and enjoying their company. I believe those joyous feelings, regardless of selfish motivations, substantiate dull everyday experiences to constitute the more wondrous and mysterious elements of human existence............

Much Love,
-Holly-

Dinner Party and Chun Dae

Well readers I have completed another week in the lovely CheongJu. Thankfully my experiences this week were much more positive......
The week proceeded in its usual manner: Wake up, run, lunch, killing time, work, and then sleep. Although it is very unexciting, I cannot complain. Throughout my entire life I have never felt completely comfortable doing nothing. In the states even if I don't have obligations I feel guilty to be unproductive. Living by myself, without any pressing obligations, I finally have the opportunity to just chill. I think learning to relax is actually productive for me.

On Friday I went out to Chun Dae for the first time after a month of residing in CheongJu. Chun Dae is the district where all the nightclubs and bars are located. There are three bars that cater to foreigners. All of the staff speak decent English and they pump some good jams. I also hit up Harlem nightclub, which is a Korean hip-hop joint. I was super-stoked to hear some Missy and Chris Brown. In reflection of Korean gender relations, men and women danced in separate groups. I saw one opposite-gender couple dancing together. Of course I used this as an opportunity to freak out some Korean men...... Ahhh the looks on their faces when I grabbed them to dance:) Priceless.

Korean dating is far different from the states. Although there are couples everywhere, their relations are very conservative. I have seen one couple publicly kissing-- in one month. Similar to middle school, PDA is very taboo. I would love to know how couples act in private. As the culture is very focused on marriage as on end(from my observations) I wonder if some of the affection is less present. I will have to continue these observations.......

On Saturday I spent several hours cooking for Tedd's going-away dinner party. {Without an oven or a microwave, finding recipes and cooking is another challenge I frequently encounter. There are so many recipes that require an oven! It is very frustrating to find something interesting and then realize I cannot make it. Once I get some extra money I hope to buy a large pot/dutch oven, so I can endeavor in baking/roasting on my stove-top. } I made a large effort to cook authentic American cuisine. I went for Cajun-themed dishes; blackened chicken, corn-tomato saute, ect. We don't have full-size tables or chairs so our party took place on the floor:) Yay I love dinner parties! Eventually I will have to throw one of my famous murder mystery parties.

Sunday was Chuseok, one of the biggest Korean holidays where Koreans visit their ancestral hometowns and share a feast of Korean traditional food. CheongJu was a ghost town. During my afternoon walk, I only encountered very few people. The street that usually bustles with cabs and buses was basically desolate. Later that night our group headed out to Chun Dae again. As most establishment were closed for the holiday, it appeared as if all the bored resident foreigners were packed into the bar( which is humorously called called Roadking). Anywho it was fun to actually get out of my apartment and socialize.{ With my recent poor health and fatigue I have done very little outside of work.}

In conclusion I am feeling a little more positive about living in Korea. Nonetheless, I miss everyone and feel pretty isolated. However I am living and breathing, so it can't be too bad:)

Week 3

My lovely friends and family,

Good News! I am alive:) After the third day of sleeping the fog began to lift and the humanity crept back inside me. AH, no stomach pain-- what a novel idea:)

On the health end of the spectrum, my life was further complicated when I discovered that one of my multiple mosquito bites had developed a nasty infection. Yes, for some reason with all the other discomfort I failed to question why the bite was still itching and burning. Yay for infections! A woman can't live without them....

Besides my health concerns this week passed relatively uneventful. The most interesting thing to report is my trip to Seoul.

So Saturday morning I caught a bus to the central Seoul bus terminal. From there I managed to get lost in the ridiculously nice mall that is attached to the bus terminal. After wondering about for a bit I spotted an older westerner. After I asked for directions to the subway he very graciously went out of his way to guide me through the convoluted path to the station. I have noticed that when I meet other Westerners in Korea, they are typically super friendly. I suppose going a couple of hours or even whole day without participating in comprehensive conversation results in feelings of isolation. So decreased opportunities to fully express oneself causes an increased value to the limited opportunities present.....
Once I got on the subway I experienced further issues following 30 minutes of travel in the wrong directions. All of this was very frustrating, but I persevered and eventually arrived at the Coex mall exit. {On a side note the Seoul subway system is pretty comprehensive, but unfortunately travel on the trains is not exactly rapid. Yet in comparison to the LA metro: I think travel speed can be compromised for greater accessibility.} A lot of the malls, including Coex, are underground. I was surprised by the amount of designer apparel at the mall. The place is packed with gucci/chanel/ect. Also to my great delight there was this adorable sandwich shop called Linas. You can't appreciate the fantastic-nature of a ham and cheese sandwich, until they are not readily available:) After dropping off my stuff at the lodging school the provides in Seoul, Lauren(fellow teacher) and I hopped on the subway to meet Tedd/Michael(other instructors) and Erin(Tedd's friend) at Seodaemun Prison. The Prison was used by the Japanese to torture Korean patriots during its colonizations. It felt very sad learning about the site's history. Another example of humans brutalizing other humans. Although I know a lot about psychological desensitization, I am always astounded by the terrible potential that lies dormant in every individual. The prison struck me with a double-whammy when I was reminded of the Korean comfort women( Korean women that the Japanese sexually enslaved and then murdered). The fact that those men and so many other individuals(since the beginning of time) can overlook the personhood of another legitimate human beings makes me want to vomit. There is no accurate way for me to express how these crimes sicken me.
From the prison we went to North Seoul Tower. The tower is a random structure planted on the side of a mountain. The view was spectacular: I could see all of Seoul and further into the country. My thoughts about this experience are a) Seoul is frickin humongous b) I love/hate young Korean couples. So they are super adorable; the girls are always absolutely beautiful dressed in dresses and heels(basically at all times) and the guys, who seem to cater to the women, are just as well dressed. It is slightly overwhelming to see so many couples that are way too cute constantly. I am both jealous and taken aback( I wonder about the content of their relationships). On the tower patio we watched some Korean b-boys/girls. i was very humored to watch their performance. Their hip-hop is a lot softer than the hip-hop I am used to watching. The girls performing seemed very shy initially and basically remained that way throughout the performance.
Following the tower we all rambled down to Hongdae, one of the club districts that cater to university students and young foreigners. Hongdae is a trippy area, where I saw the largest amount of foreigners in 3 weeks. Still most of the folks appeared to be Korean students. I finally got to dance, even if it was to house music:) A lot of the foreigners I observed appeared very skeezy, but it was late at night in club district....
Well let us hope I can avoid the skeezes and have luck finding my Korean husband:)



Sending my love,
-Holly-

Week2

The week started off and ended with sickness.
On Monday Tedd had a kidney stone bout, which required him to go to the hospital. Since Tedd is the teacher I am replacing, I ended covering for him and teaching 4 hours of classes. This was a bit unexpected because I am in training, so I have mainly observed and assisted during classes. I wasn't completely prepared to teach, but I gave it my best. I felt quite silly because my grading took foreverrrrrr. Thankfully Tedd made it out alive and now I know what to look for while I am watching the other teachers.
The next two days were primarily unremarkable. During the afternoon, before work, I go on walks in the area around my apartment. I love seeing all the youngsters run about; it reminds me of my own childhood. Jen and I would bike about or create adventures in our alley. For the most part, young American kids don't play outside anymore. There is a certain amount of magic that the outdoors possesses and I think it's a shame that some kids miss out.
On the subject of children: When i am out at the market or on a walk, eager kids frequently approach me and ask me my name, how I am doing, where I am from. Most likely these are the questions they have learned in school. It is super cute! With all the stares and random smiles I feel like a celebrity. At the moment I appreciate the friendly attention, but I can imagine that it could get tiresome........
The weeks turning point arrived on Wednesday: Since we work from 4-10:30PM, the school provides dinner. I have courageously sampled many new dishes each night. Besides a few plates that I find agreeable, I resort to the rice and the fruit in my purse. Anyways---- On Wednesday I tried this raw fish that was really revolting. Following dinner my stomach was slightly upset. Then Thursday when I woke I had a headache and some stomach pains, which basically subsided following my morning workout.
On Friday when I woke up the pain was worse and I didn't go away. To minimize the discomfort I curled up in a ball and slept most of the day. The sickness on Friday was a huge reminder of just how far I am from home. I have no clue where to locate Common remedies that sick Americans implement. It is a classic story of you do not know what you have until it's gone. I realize chicken noodle soup is probably ineffective in demobilizing viruses and other various pathogens, but psychologically it helps in a large magnitude. The distance from Korea to California is also more apparent. I am conflicted at moment; is the the distance good or bad? The distance could help me grow more independent and all that mumbo-jumbo I have heard repeatedly. However, I believe it is one-dimensional to claim any human person exists without the assistance of others. Currently I think that every adult must be substantially independent. Nonetheless it would be short-sighted to assert that people exist as lonely mountains. There are moments in every person's life, in which lack the energy or resources to handle certain situations. I believe that it's acceptable to relinquish independence in those moments. So all that inner-reasoning is to say, I realized complete independence is not necessary or even reasonable.
Saturday I slept basically the whole day, except for 2 episodes of America's Next Top Model( Sending my love Jordan!)
Now it is Sunday. The pain is less constant and I am praying(although I don't pray) that it will terminate tomorrow. I hope I hope I hope! At the moment the stomach discomfort is minimal if stay immobile, but I cannot stay in this chair forever.
Well I am sure this painting a fantastic picture of Korea for everyone:) My new plan is to bring my own dinner to work and forgo all this madness.
Much Love,
-Holly-
P.S. I hope someone will go to El Torito and Mimi's, where they serve cooked food, in my spirit.

Week 1

So, I successfully survived my first week in Cheongju. Yay!
The week started out a bit rough. I got into Seoul following a hellish 12 hour flight. My baggage didn't arrive for an hour. Then, the non-English speaking cabbie the school had sent whisked me away. He was literally running to the cab. The whole thing was quite confusing.
When I arrived at my apartment I passed out for awhile. When awoke I was starving but had no won on hand, so was basically starving. Then ted, my coworker, showed up and saved the day.
The rest of the week consisted in me going to the market and work. The market was pretty confusing; I rely on pictures for the most part. Bread is really thick and apples are huge! I was able to locate bagels at the dunkin donuts (which are as prevalent as bacteria here)
Throughout the week i observed the citizens of cheongju: The women are impeccably dressed-- full makeup and usually heels. I am astounded with their beauty and elegance. The men are less eye-catching. However, the younger guys are much more fashion-focused than most American men.
On Saturday some of the teachers and I ventured to chungju lake , where we planned to take a ferry to the gosu caves. The ferry dropped us prematurely, which we were not aware of initially. After several phone calls and the like we traveled by cab 12 km, where the caves were located. The caves were really cold and neat to look at. Korean families go on lots of weekend trips within the mountains so the place was packed. Totally different than American grannies, elder Korean women were huffing it up the cave's multitude of staircases. I was most impressed.
Next we headed to pyeongtek, nearby camp humphreys. My fellow teachers friend owns a burrito shop on strip of bars that caters to the army personnel. I was so thankful for the Mexican culinary delights, even if it wasn't as good as el torito. I bopped about and talked to some of the guys. It was nice to have a full conversation. Since I know so little Korean, unless I am talking with some one from school, the last week consisted in 3 word conversations.
Although I am missing home quite a bit right now, I am going to hold on. At the moment it is difficult for me to exist without close contact to others. I like hugs, smiles, and people loving me. I keep telling myself I will get there. In the mean time I am missing my family, friends, and American food.

P.S. Check out these photos
http://s538.photobucket.com/albums/ff343/hbingham14/